Breath
I have a strong relationship with my breath which was non-existent before I had anxiety. Before anxiety I took breathing for granted, casting it off cliffs and holding it to the max underwater. I would run and sing and cry without any thought to what was making all these functions chug along. Anxiety was a sudden onset that began teaching me how to pay attention to the most critical function we have…. breathing. I could not take deep breaths when I was fearful or anxious and it would make me so frustrated! It took some time to have gratitude for my anxiety which finally came to me through a teacher who was able to educate me about breathing. I was being taught to stop, pay attention, and retrain the faulty old lessons.
When I get activated in an emotional response I have been conditioned to not breathe. I was little trying to not be seen when my parents were fighting. I was a teenager trying to not get chosen in class. I was an adult trying to get along. All the while I was holding my breath. I first noticed it when I argued with someone and had to be near them. I was very conscious of my trying to not be heard by them--in my breathing. "How Curious.” I thought to myself. Over time I noticed it again and again. I would lay, sit, or, stand next to someone who I was having conflict with, and my breathing would become so still and shallow. Not the calm kind of breathing, the restricted kind. I started to retrain myself by saying “It’s ok to breathe”, “Just breathe.”
There were a lot of years stored up and retraining the way I breathe has taken many ticks of my clock. I practice breathing in regular moments of life. Dr. Andrew Weil teaches a type of breath that helped me reset in many of my anxious panics. It’s prescribed as this: in through the nose for 4 quick counts and held for 7 quick counts and out for 8…. done 10 times in a row. Done several times a day, done with slower counts, done in the shower, done at stoplights, done at school, done wherever the anxious tickle shows up, and in just as many moments, preparing when it hasn’t. It resets the nervous system and helps kick your parasympathetic muscles into gear. As a visual learner I always think of this breath as pulling the rip cord to a parachute taking me into a smoother descent; left and right gliding smoother until I can hit the ground with my feet. Grounded.
Box breath, fire breath, mantra breath, belly breath…there’s so many out there. Find one that works for you and use it, and curiously. Listen and learn; the body will never lead you astray.
